So I heard a song on the radio with the lyrics, “I don’t really like myself without you.” Thanks for that Blink-182.
It took me back to moments in my past relationships. It made me think of times where I put myself in less than ideal situations where all I wanted was to be saved. I remember feeling like, Someone loves me enough to come save me from this situation -to save me from destroying myself. I used to like myself more through someone else’s eyes. After hearing the song, I felt oddly disconnected from it. It was like I outgrew its message. I wasn’t there anymore because at this point in my life, I like who I am. I am not proud every mistake I have ever made, but I am proud of myself for owning it-for trying to be more honest with myself & for loving myself despite my flaws. When I think about letting someone new into my life, I can’t imagine saying that I don’t like myself without them in my world. I think it’s because I don’t need a person to teach me how to love myself anymore. I know I am worthy of being treated with dignity and respect. I try my best to show that kind of love for others and I am glad I am finally at a point where I can recognize what serves me and what doesn’t. For a long time I was under the impression I needed a savior and I am really happy that I learned how save myself. I have a long way to go but it doesn’t deter me from being optimistic. The world is full of endless possibilties and it makes it easier when you accept yourself fully and can welcome those opportunities.